Rock On, Funky Bro
by SuicunesRibbonButt
Summary: Falkner wants to learn how to play the guitar and luckily, Morty just so happens to be skilled in the guitar department.


I'll be honest, I always thought of Falkner as a bit…..dense. And I mean sure, he probably thinks the same exact thing about me, I mean, a lot of people do and I know that, but no that's totally different. This is Falkner we're talking about. Falkner…..thinking I'm below his own mental capacity, come on that's totally not right I mean…okay I forgot what I was talking about but I'll just get on with the story about Falkner.

Falkner and I are buds, gym leaders gotta stick together after all. Can't leave one of my homies in the dust. Well I guess I could leave Chuck or Pryce in the dust, but they're old so they don't count. I'm only talking about the cool people around my age. We're all good friends…..Falkner, Whitney, Jasmine, Clair, hell even Bugsy could be cool sometimes. He'll come to league meetings and bring everyone popsicles that his mom gave him to give to all of us. Can't complain about that. Chuck is just scary….he's yelled at me too many times for me to think he's cool. "MORTY WHY ARE YOU 10 MINUTES LATE TO THE MEETING AGAIN?!" "MORTY WHY ARE YOU EATING DURING THE MEETING?!" "MORTY WHY DO YOU REEK OF WEED?!" Like whoa Chuck shut up I'm not your son you can't control this free spirit. I guess Pryce could be decent…..doesn't really say much though. I asked him to take me fishing once because all old men like fishing, and he told me to fuck off. Okay wow man just speaking the truth. You're old and old people like fishing. It's a known fact look it up on Wikipedia. I got off topic….uhmmm yeah, out of all the gym leaders in Johto, Falkner is probably the leader I'm closest to.

And that translates to…..I'll pretty much dumbly fulfill all the lame things he asks of me.

And that in itself, I feel, completes the circle of life. I fulfill Falkner's requests, Eusine fulfills my requests, and Eusine has no one to fulfill his requests. All is in order.

I was honestly surprised when Falkner asked me a particular question one day.

It was early April of last year, we went out to lunch together because….well we were both hungry so why not? We were both settled in, me shoving fries into my mouth and him picking at the salad that sat in front of him, when he popped the question.

"Morty…can I ask you something?"

I just looked at him and finished the fry I was eating. I gave him a little nod to continue.

"Well it's just that I've been thinking about stuff and where my life is going outside of the gym and I decided…..I want to learn how to play the guitar. Is that weird?"

I let out a deep breath, I was kinda worried he would be asking something else that I mean….well….no never mind.

"No Falkner, that's not weird. It's good that you want to pick up a hobby like that, especially music. It's really stress relieving." I was talking out of my ass.

"I'm so relieved you think so, Morty. Wow I thought you'd start making fun of me or something…." He paused, "like you always do."

"No actually, yeah I think this is great for you. Hell, I'll even teach you if you want!"

"Wait Morty…I didn't know you play the guitar, really?"

"Yeah sure, I've been playing for years!"

And that was that. I was then stuck teaching Falkner how to play the guitar.

Go forward a few weeks and Falkner shows up at my house one day unexpectedly, guitar and a bunch of books in his arms. Now by him showing up unexpectedly, I mean I was baked as hell when he came over, sitting there on my floor in boxers not really sure what was going on when I heard the doorbell. I honestly don't even know how I made it to the door to open it for Falkner and god, when I saw him standing there with a dorky smile on his face, it was all just downhill.

"Wow teacher, you certainly look prepared for class!" Falkner thinks he so fucking funny sometimes.

I ignored him and stumbled over to grab a hoodie off my couch to put on. Falkner walked in and coughed a bit, I guess he couldn't handle the smell of weed. That's his own problem though. He just sat down on the couch and adjusted the guitar on his lap. I was in some deep shit but I didn't realize it at the moment.

"Uhmmm….hold on man let me get my guitar." I walked over to my tv and pulled a guitar hero guitar out from behind it. This was my plan all along; thank god I was able to remember it while I was in my own world. I kicked my PS2 to turn it on and luckily, Guitar Hero 3 was in it, booting up. I looked behind my shoulder at Falkner, who was just sitting there with a look on his face that was a combination of pissed off and confused. I flashed him a smile. He didn't return it.

I sat down next to him, guitar controller in hand. Flipping through the song choices. I don't even know what I ended up picking in the end.

"Morty, please be honest with me…." Oh great, Falkner started running his mouth. "Is this what you meant by the fact you could teach me how to play the guitar? You were just gonna teach me how to play Guitar Hero?"

I scoffed at that notion.

"No way man listen to me…..to play the actual instrument, you gotta get rhythm and practice. And that's where Guitar Hero comes in. You practice with Guitar Hero then eventually, you'll be able to play the guitar. Feel me?"

Falkner ate that shit up. I wasn't kidding when I said that he's kind of dense. First of all, he believed me while I was high. Second of all, Falkner was better than I was at Guitar Hero like, why would such a skilled player think that he was honestly gonna be helped by pressing colored buttons on a fake guitar over and over?

What a man Falkner is. To this day, he still plays Guitar Hero with me, thinking he's prepping to play the guitar. I wonder when he'll realize I'm full of shit?

Unless he's just going along with me just to please me….thinking I'm the dense one?

_Oh no. _


End file.
